What I wish I said at the stage door of Tina Fey & Amy Poehler's Restless Leg Tour on Galentine's Day 2024

Dear JAMMers,

Multiple hundreds of dollars later.

One mama's night out later.

A few hours of waiting at a stage door later.

It happened.

I utterly embarrassed myself in front of two of my heroes.

There is video proof at the end of this story - turn the sound on. I am a Type A, anxious girlie. So when I purchased tickets to the Restless Leg Tour in NYC, I of course practiced a speech I would give to Tina & Amy should I find myself in their midst. Did anything resembling a rational thought leave my mouth? No.

Let's take a few steps back. My sister is a writer as her profession. She is also my baby sister, who is actually 30 years old. So when this tour came to town, I knew I would have someone on board to spend whatever it took to be in the same room as Tina & Amy. We made the purchase very last minute and didn't regret it. After all, the show was on Galentine's Day for goodness' sake.

Our seats at the Beacon Theatre weren't the best, but we were there. Maya Rudolph was the surprise guest. I don't know what is more ingrained in my core memories more - Maya doing her Whitney Houston impression live, before my eyes OR Amy Poehler slouched back in her Weekend Update chair, just present in the moment and laughing her ass off at her best friend.

You leave their show feeling even more in love with them as a comedy duo and even more in awe of their versatility. Speaking of leaving the show, we just so happened to be ushered out a door that was next to the stage door. My sister and I look at each other and almost without having to speak words, we agreed we would wait to see if we got lucky enough to see them exit.

As we stood, waiting to be in our own personal glory, we unexpectedly found ourselves getting close up views of Steve Martin, Andrea Martin, Jane Krakowski, Bobby Flay, and more. We were rendered speechless already. I only connected it was Steve Martin because of his trademark posture and gait.

There were only maybe 40 people waiting at the stage door with us, which for NYC is pretty small. We were going to get a good look if we could brave the cold.

A couple hours after the show ended you can tell there was a switch in security teams. They were finally exiting!

(No judgment, ladies. Take your time - at all times - and don't apologize for it. You are our queens.)

When Tina, Amy and Maya emerged, my eloquent speech left my brain. All I could muster was screams of "You are legends," "We love you!" and "Legends Only." Now, this crowd of fans was all women and a very quiet group of women at that. There is no way they didn't hear me sounding ridiculous. They were gentle and kind and took time to say hello and thank everyone for waiting.

Here is what I should have said, if my practiced speech didn't leave my brain:

• Tina & Amy: Women, Steve Martin & Marty Short: Men. Please go to Broadway.

• They named Carol Burnett as one of their biggest heroes. Tina & Amy, you are the Carol Burnett for millennials.

• Their examples as working mothers, aging gracefully in Hollywood, and remaining down-to-earth inspire me endlessly

• 30 Rock and Parks and Recreation have brought me immense comfort and joy, even through my most tumultuous days and sleepless nights. I have watched both series all the way through at least 10 times.

• My sister who is with me tonight is a writer and I think she could contribute joy and thoughtfulness to the world just like you. I am so glad she has role models like you in her industry.

But instead I just screamed "Legends Only" a few times. Gosh, I hope I get another chance one day.

No worries,

Jaclyn